Lush celebrations

I'm definitely on my way out of mental health volunteering now though I haven't left officially. I've decided not to stay and fight but take care of myself and do what I want to. Of course I will have to explain reasons for not staying. About time I moved on though it is difficult for me to leave a place where I've been for over five years. Mental health volunteering is not a permanent place to stay for mental health service users, ex-users and survivors. They should out there in other areas of volunteering if they decide to volunteer. Mental health charities need these people more than they need the charities as a place to volunteer. However they are not used fully and allowed to express their viewpoints honestly. They are allowed to have an input into the ways of working, procedures, social events, etc but not actually say any thing controversial. There's still a framework they must operate in. I'm also sick and tired of not seeing even very small changes occur unless they are discussed and agreed upon at different meetings and reports and procedures written up.

I decided to stay an extra day and travel tomorrow to Cornwall for my holiday instead of today. Lush are putting on Lushtonbury celebrations to try and create the atmosphere of Glastonbury with loud music, massages, aura readings, free nibble and performers outside. I had an aura reading which I had to wait some time for but it was worth it. Ibrahim is very spiritually attuned but some of these tarot and aura readers are charlatans. My energy levels are so low at the moment. I'm relying on adrenalin to keep going rather than natural energy hence the mood swings, feeling angry, excited or rushed one minute and depleted and fatigued the next. Areas of the body where there was sluggishness was mapped out and I was advised as to what aromatherapy oils, Bach flower remedies and nutritional remedies to use. Apparently the carpets are giving off positive ions and ideally need to be replaced with wooden floor boards. Wondered why my living room carpet was making me feel sluggish and fed up. I have an ioniser bought from way back to give off negative ions though I'm not sure if it works anymore so I'm going to invest in two salt lamps. Bought myself some Clary Sage oil but there is a shortage of Sandalwood oil due to the Tsunami in the Indian Ocean Boxing Day 2004.

Later....

Well, I'm back from a short night out. I went out to restaurant to celebrate somebody's birthday in the Brasserie but I didn't get there til 10.45 pm. I went just to hand over birthday card and presents. The Brasserie is huge. It extends from a narrow shop front in St Mary's Street right through to Mill Lane and skirts around the Yard on the old Brain's Brewery site. We adjourned to the King's Cross, a well known gay haunt. I chatted to some middle aged gay men about Madonna and her gay dancers and why gay men tend to be better dancers and take more care over their appearance. Not all gay men can dance but they have an advantage over straight men in that they are less inhibited with their bodies so are more willing to learn to dance. The phrase "what a waste, he's gay" is heard more often than "what a waste, he's straight" when referring to a sexy hunk who's not available to you because of his sexual orientation. Why can't straight men take as much care over their appearance as straight men as depicted in "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" where two or three gay men makeover a straight bachelor? But that's another story and I'm tired. I will be away from tomorrow for a week.